I know two people who swam from Alcatraz Island to shore more than once. Alcatraz is an abandoned prison in San Francisco Bay. The waters are very cold and choppy. There is a strong current. Because it is salt water, there are sharks.

Where do some people get  that kind of courage? Are you as courageous as you want to be? Most of us have various kinds of fear. It’s not a bad thing to have a healthy sense of fear that keeps you from danger.

There are probably some fears that are not healthy and are preventing you from living the life you want. Reach for that life! Confront and overcome those fears!

It is just a matter of willpower!

If not today, when?

This can be a very defining moment in your life and in the life of your children.

Will your kids feel they just got a “get out of jail free card?” Or, will they approach this journey into adulthood with a good relationship with you?

There are three basic issues:

MICROMANAGEMENT-If you have raised them in a strict manner with little freedom allowed, they probably resent it and want to “bust loose” once they’re gone.

LEADER/FOLLOWER-If your kids have strong leadership traits, they will be less vulnerable to those who would lead them astray.

SELF CONFIDENCE-Self confident people are more inclined to make their own decisions rather than submit to the bad behavior of others.

Lastly, tell them you love them and you are always here for them!

If not today, when?

Poorly parented kids are everywhere today. This puts a greater burden on you if you’re trying to raise a family of people who live by a good value system. They also have so much freedom and access to social media that undermine your values.

So, what can you do to earn your kids’ respect in this environment on their perilous journey to adulthood? The most important rule is, “Don’t be a hypocrite!” You must set the right example by practicing what you preach.

Listen to them. You’ll never get them to listen to you if you don’t listen to them.

Have rules of your house that everyone must follow.

Give praise for praiseworthy efforts and apply discipline when justified. Discipline, however, must be in proportion to the offense.

Always practice unconditional love!

If not today, when?

I don’t pretend to be an expert on marriage, if there is such a person. But, I have been happily married for 54 years and I can’t wait to see my wife’s face each morning! So, we must have learned something along the way.

Here are my rules:

Never cheat on your spouse.                                                                                                        Be honest.                                                                                                                                         Express your love in different ways such as helping with chores.                         Always let your spouse know he or she is the most important person in your life.         If you have offended your spouse, give a sincere apology quickly. Don’t linger.            Allow your spouse private moments.                                                                                        Find things to do that you both enjoy. Create fun times.                                                    Be quick to forgive.                                                                                                                        Talk things out. Don’t give your spouse “The Silent Treatment.”                                          Do a lot of kissing, hugging and loving regardless of your ages!

If not today, when?

PARENTAL LOVE: This kind of love is not mere affection for your child. No, Parental Love is an all encompassing effort which includes leadership as its very unique quality. To be even more direct, you can’t allow the inmates to run the asylum! Children need guidance and if they don’t get it from you, the world provides many other sources to them.

STRUCTURE: You must have rules that you and your children live by. These guidelines will help your children become responsible members of society.  Rules of behavior must be enforced with consequences. The consequences include praise for following the rules and some appropriate form of discipline for breaking them.

Throughout your children’s lives, they need Parental Love and Structure.

If not today, when?

 

 

The old days of dad going off to work while mom stayed home to raise the kids, shop for groceries, prepare the meals, clean the house, chauffeur the kids, schedule doctor appointments, wash the clothes, etc. are gone!

If your family is fortunate enough to have both spouses raising your children together, it is important that both parents are “all in!” Separation of responsibilities is really not practical anymore considering our pace of living. Also, in order to maintain your financial needs, both of you are probably employed.

Dads have to pitch in wherever needed to keep the family moving in the right direction! It is unfair for one spouse to do 75% of the work!

Forget the old stereotypes. It’s a new ballgame!

If not today, when?

What a huge tragedy for one family to bear! He had two kinds of riches; financial and familial. I bet he would pay any price to bring his kids back to life.

If you are blessed with people in your life, you are also rich. Oh, I know they all have shortcomings of one kind or another, but so do you. In the midst of all your daily hustle and bustle, it is important to sometimes pause and take a moment to thank God for your family and friends.

Don’t ever take them for granted! They are a gift that is here today and should be celebrated today. When is the last time you told each and every one that you love them?

If not today, when?

 

Recently, a young seminarian was playing in a soccer game when he suddenly collapsed and died on the field. Three days after his funeral, he appeared to one of his teammates and said, “If only you could see what I see!”

Every once in a while, we get reminders of life after death. When they communicate with us in some manner, they always seem happy. I believe we can live happier lives here on earth if we know that our deceased loved ones are happy in the hereafter.

So, let’s move on with our lives safe in the knowledge that good things are ahead of us!

As the Reverend Jesse Jackson always told us: “Keep hope alive!”

If not today, when?

If you worry, you are presupposing you know the future.

Sorry, but you don’t!

After living 77 years of life, starting 8 businesses, having 6 children and 22 grand children, I’ve had plenty to worry about. Listen to this: The overwhelming amount of worries never happened! I wasted a lot of nervous energy and angst on ideas I created in my mind that never materialized.

Yes, good and bad things happened that I did not anticipate, but they were going to happen anyway. That’s why we must absolutely be thankful for today because we don’t know the future, but we can surely ruin today worrying about it.

Most of the tomorrows you create in your mind don’t exist!

Don’t ruin today! Live it! Be thankful for it!

If not today, when?

There is a new normal in our daily lives. It is the constant news of events in every remote corner of the world. We are brought to the scene via 24 hour TV networks and the internet playing video, photos and live reporting on our cell phones.

I think there are a whole lot of calamities around the world we really don’t need to know about! So, our minds are filled with our own personal agenda as well as traumatic happenings being felt by people we don’t know and never will know.

These distractions mean that many of us have difficulty devoting ourselves to a given task. Would you be happier and more productive if you returned to the “old normal” not allowing your mind to be filled with unnecessary news and trauma?

  Try living YOUR life simply without 24 hour news.

If not today, when?