If you are raising children, you’ve got a real battle on your hands!

Every day in the media (which can reach your kids in many different ways), supposedly responsible adults are doing irresponsible things.

The latest example came yesterday with the revelation that wealthy parents were using illegal means to get their kids into prestigious universities. This devious plan took openings away from truly deserving kids who went through the application process honorably.

So, your behavior, both in word and in deed, is the only honest source of information your kids can rely on. Your challenge is  made more difficult because you are often the last person a teenager wants to talk to.

One of the best ways to get your messages across is when riding in the car together. Even if they don’t speak, they hear!

If not today, when?

Do you know anyone who gives their blood from time to time so they can raise some much needed cash? I do.

He is 24 years old now and has been doing it for years. Actually, this is a very common practice in the poorer communities. He finally began a good job two weeks ago, but doesn’t get his first paycheck till this coming Friday. He worked 141 hours in the last two weeks with 23 hours of it in overtime. So, he’s going to give blood today so he can pay the Uber driver to take him to work because he doesn’t own a car.

Poor people live near us, but in a completely different world than you and me.

Please don’t ever take your blessings for granted!

If not today, when?

One evening when returning from a date in the middle of his teens, one of our sons announced to his mother, “Girls don’t fart!” He went on to explain that he had dated several girls by his advanced age of seventeen and not one of them had ever farted.

I’m using this episode as an intro into a serious topic.

As good manners are important in the dating stage, they are equally important after marriage. You should still say, “Please and Thank you, Excuse Me, I’m Sorry, etc.”  It is a sign of respect for your partner to practice good etiquette throughout your marriage.

Many times, you treat a complete stranger better than someone who has devoted his or her life to you.

Keep the love alive!

If not today, when?

Do you believe the relationship with your spouse should be one in which each partner contributes 50%? It seems logical enough.

Before we were married, we attended some marriage counseling sessions. In one of the sessions, we were told that each partner should contribute 60% instead of 50%. The man said that this would prevent a gap or breakdown that might occur if each person thought they only had to go half way.

Shortly before our marriage, I was the best man for a friend who had served in the Navy with me. His father spoke at the reception and said marriage is like a carriage being pulled by two horses. If one horse is sick, the other horse will have to pull harder so it can get to its destination. A good example of the 60% rule!

If not today, when?

We have all been wronged by someone along life’s path. Some infractions  were minor, others were perhaps major.

The question is not, “Did they occur?” The appropriate question should be, “What are you going to do about it?” Regardless of whether or not you responded in some manner, do you still carry a grudge?

If so, a long held grudge is part of the clutter of our lives that can become a barrier to our happiness and inner peace. You owe yourself a better future than that! It all comes down to self management or a lack of self management.

Which thoughts will you permit yourself to have, those that regularly drag you down or those that deal with the issues of today and those that help you build a better clutter free future?

If not today, when?

What is your system of values?

What kind of behavior will you accept or not accept from yourself or others? Or, do you just go along in order to get along?

Far too many people in our present society subjugate their own value system to the will of the crowd so they can be accepted by others who may be misbehaving.

Also, if you’re a parent, what kind of value system do your children learn from you? Remember, they actually learn a lot more from what you do than what you say!

Before worrying about getting along with others, when you lie your head down at night, can you get along with yourself? You won’t have to live with current friends all your life, but you will have to live with yourself!

If not today, when? 

You are a self fulfilling prophecy! You will either live up to or down to the image you have of yourself.

If you were raised in an atmosphere of approval and praise, you probably have a healthy sense of self esteem. On the contrary, if you lived with criticism and negativity, you may have carried self criticism into adulthood.

Some people succeed as adults because they were told they would. Unfortunately, others were told they would never amount to much.

Regardless of your upbringing, it is never too late to begin seeing yourself as a winner! It is possible to grow from a negative childhood into a positive adulthood. You can begin by giving yourself rewards for your accomplishments.

Remember, if you think you can, you will. If you think you can’t, you won’t!

If not today, when?

 

Many people are intimidated by others. It could be members of your own family, friends or co-workers. Over the long run, however, it is not a good thing that you remain quiet when you really have something important to say.

Just because someone else is domineering, it doesn’t mean that their point of view is any more valuable than yours. You have an obligation to the other person and to yourself to express your thoughts when the situation calls for it.

Don’t walk away from a conversation regretting that you didn’t speak up when the issue being discussed was one that you care deeply about. We need your opinions and life experiences in order to learn things that can better inform all of us!

Next time, speak up!

If not today, when?

Have you learned the art of contentment?

Or, are you forever restless and in search of MORE?

I heard a news story about a man who is a governor and thinking of running for U.S. Senator. His wife told him she would only be happy if her next address was 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington D.C.

So, I ask the question, “How much is enough?” I guess we are always seeking happiness. The irony of this lifelong pursuit is that contentment or happiness is not found from something outside, but rather something inside of you. It is a state of mind.

Haven’t we all seen happy people who don’t have much and unhappy people who have everything?

Your happiness is solely dependent on the decision you make to be happy regardless of the difficulties that come along.

If not today, when?

 

Do you have a person in your life who has that “Certain Smile?” You may have more than one. It could be an adult or child whose smile lights up your life. If so, you have been blessed.

Maybe you have a “Certain Smile” that lights up other people’s lives.

We know its not money that makes people happy. Millionaires and billionaires are always running around trying to find ways to make more money. They are never satisfied.

No, one of the greatest gifts is that “Certain Smile!” Cherish it! Thank God for it! Give out your own smile in the hope that you will light up someone’s life.

My wife has that “Certain Smile!”

It has been lighting up my life for 54 years!

If not today, when?